He sits at the same bench as he does everyday, the smell of the sea filling his lungs, seventy years ago as a young boy really, but at the time he thought of himself as a man. he had walked along this quay with his father, not the first time he had been to sea, but the first time as part of the crew.
The sky was blue, that perfect summer blue, the gulls were singing, dive-bombing the sailors as they unloaded one of the last fishing boats, trying of steal the catch.
the smells never changed, ozone, salt, diesel form the engines and a hint of rotten fish. Smells so familiar that he had to concentrate to notice them.
He did not know any of the current generation of sailors, all younger than his own children. His wife though the years had raised there three children, and raised them well. good kids, but they had moved away, and for the last two years the pain of loneliness had been hard to coupe with. not that he would ever say anything, they had there own lives.
A boat cast off engine note increasing as she gently but with determination, headed toward the open sea. oh how he envied them the freedom, the wind in you hair, salt spray on you face. none on there realised how luckily they were.
He moved on the bench, sitting to long had at some point become painful, when did he become old. the man in the mirror weathered and tired. not the man inside.
The last box was lifted off the and the sale of the catch commenced. shouts as buyers decided the worth of the crew, most for the captain, as he takes all the risk, and a fraction for the boy. do they still have boys ? he doubted it.
Two boys walk past, not a life at sea for the but at least fishing there rods rigged ready to cast, the enthusiasm of the young, he new the tide was wrong to catch much but also new that at that age catching was just the icing on the cake, being free to stare out to sea was reward enough.
oh how he envied them
so he sits, and fills his lungs with the smells, his ears with the sounds and looks out to sea.
he feels a tug on his sleeve, “Granddad, Daddy said you might be here” as look of pure love in her eyes, and the regrets are gone, the loneliness banished and his life is complete.
